Pick my Drink

[hungryjoe]

@JohnnyCache

I drank 14 cement mixers in 90 minutes once. The bar in question subsequently banned dropshots on wristband night. And hired a new bouncing staff. And closed their balcony. And replaced all their real plants with plastic ones. And passed a strict “do not pick up three balls from a money pool game and start juggling them” rule.

For Escrimidor: It was that shithole, Sidelines.

For Dozer, here is a guide to drinking:

avoid shots with funny names unless you are buying a round of them for a table full of people.

You may be tempted to order a dry martini, shaken not stirred, with barely any vermouth, like james bond. Be aware that this is essentially a quadruple shot of straight gin with three olives in it.

I recommend you start with a tanqueray and tonic. I (tanqueray is a brand of gin).
Then have a vodka cranberry. This is commonly held to be a woman’s drink but it will fortify your shit with it’s sugar and vitamin C.

Then you should have something called a “black and tan”

This will lead you to be curious about the two layers in the black and tan, and you will try them separately.

Then you’ll order a murphy’s stout.

Then you’ll order a six pack of rolling rock, to go, and drink it on the subway. Then you’ll go BACK to the bar and have an irish coffee. Then you’ll realize that you’re wasting space on coffee and just order three fingers of jameson.

NOW you order a round of cement mixers for your “bros”

inform them before imbibing that you will always place those for whom you feel fraternal bonds ordinally ahead of women practitioners of the world’s oldest profession.

Shoot.

IF you keep that down, it’s the time in the night when you start ordering faggoty fruit basket shots for anything with clevage. (this may lead to forswearing your recent oath, but that’s cool you’re drunk) This is also the time to order “a perfect manhatten” or a mexican flag, or a grasshopper, or a stone fence, or a boilermaker, or any other stupid thing you heard charles bronson order in a movie and want to try once.

This is the point where I begin to pickup a mild buzz and swtich to my patented tipple - the “anna kournkova” - this is a tripple white russian in a tall glass, with a cherry on top.

Once you have your white russian in hand, I won’t say you’re a hero, because what’s a hero? But you might just be the man for your time and place.

abide.

OR - you could try titty milk from a crack whore.

JC - you are the one.

[Rivington]

Just order a gimlet, like your old homosexual uncle.

[hoodedmonk]

Big dozer because I like you------->http://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/Cement_Mixer_(shot)

[hoodedmonk]

Arrrghhh fail! try this http://www.drinksmixer.com/drink469.html
make sure you read the comments at the bottom of the page.

[hungryjoe]

@JP

If you weren’t a first timer I’d say shots of Jameson with a Guinness pint.

Actually, that’s what I’m telling you to do. If you’re going to do something wrong, do it right. Ingrain good drinking habits now.

Oh and these guys won’t tell you this, but I will. To avoid wasting your entire following day recovering, one glass of water for every round you drink.

Anybody who tells you different you tell them JP said “Go fuck yourself.”

Oh, and make sure you’re with a friend who won’t let you drunk-dial that engaged hose-beast.

Do not listen to JP.

The rule is no more than one ice cube to an .oz of whiskey.

If you can remember what you did last night, you have not established good drinking habits.

Tell JP that JD said “you’ll cain’t drunk in nawyak” caws I knowz the hoseybeasty.

I haz picktures four proves.

[hoodedmonk]

Johnny 14 cement mixers!.. why?

[johnnycache]

@hoodedmonk

Johnny 14 cement mixers!.. why?

As I recall it involved a bet that I was more “lactose tolerant” then my buddy. HE only drank 13. And technically, they don’t count because he didn’t hold them till midnight.

edit: Clicked on your link.

wait.

They weren’t cement mixers.

GOD I wish they had been

the cement mixer has a big brother that comes in a pint glass:

They were Irish Car Bombs

[hoodedmonk]

OMG! I’ll stick to Odouls amber.

[hungryjoe]

ya’ll cain’t drink

OP

Drink whut ye must.

Following did little for me except collect me pretty many bottlez.

Ifin I wuz u, i’d be lookin for somez ruffies and chasn cooger momz.

Just my $0.02 wit changze

[MrJ]

@JP

… a Guinness pint.

Actually, that’s what I’m telling you to do. If you’re going to do something wrong, do it right. Ingrain good drinking habits now.

… one glass of water for every round you drink.

I second that advice. Guinness is an excellent quality drink, although you may need to develop a taste for it. Try it. I find I can drink a fair bit of it without hangover effects that would have happened with a similar quantity of other Canadian beers. Have a good meal, drink your water. Have fun, stay safe and hope you enjoy yourself.

[escrimador6]

@JohnnyCache

I drank 14 cement mixers in 90 minutes once. The bar in question subsequently banned dropshots on wristband night. And hired a new bouncing staff. And closed their balcony. And replaced all their real plants with plastic ones. And passed a strict “do not pick up three balls from a money pool game and start juggling them” rule.

For Escrimidor: It was that shithole, Sidelines.

You’re first mistake was going there. Second was 14 Car Bombs in one night, let alone in 90 minutes. However, the fact that you got them to ban things, hire new staff, close the balcony, replace plants and place rules on the pool balls makes me wish I had been there to witness it.

[cuatro76]

White Russians, Lebowski style.

http://www.idrink.com/v.html?id=5365

[Frank_White]

THE NEXT DAY…

make sure you have plenty of water, Smartwater has electrolytes which you will need to replenish. Vitamin B6, B12, C, and potassium supplements, especially the Bs. 5 hour energy shots without the caffeine, unless you’re a caffeine junkie. Eggs and hash browns, eggs have something called cystine or something, which helps, and hash browns are good and greasy. pepto bysmol, alka seltzer, maybe asparin. No “hair of the dog” aka more alcohol. Gatorade and snickers will get you through the day if, God forbid, you have to work. Barf if you feel the need, it helps. Watch comedies and take a nap.

Have the water, and a wastebasket next to your bed when you get home. Have fun and stay safe.

[johnnycache]

@escrimador6

You’re first mistake was going there. Second was 14 Car Bombs in one night, let alone in 90 minutes. However, the fact that you got them to ban things, hire new staff, close the balcony, replace plants and place rules on the pool balls makes me wish I had been there to witness it.

Well, they used to do a 10 dollar wrist band on thursday night, don’t know if they still do - and we reasoned we’d get our load on and go someplace else, but then things . . . devolved.

The awesome thing was the absolute FLUME of curdled, vile, evil my buddy produced on their dance floor

Sadly, the fat girls and their companions scattered rather then slip and fall, for a second it had the potential for a real fight-club-flailing-around-in-marla’s-mom’s-fat kind of moment

Once of the pool players broke a cue over my back like in a movie. It was pretty rad.

PS: Not being an employee of that wretched sin barn, I don’t know if those things are written, enduring policy or not, they’re just changes I noticed soon after.

[Snake_Plissken]

@Frank White

THE NEXT DAY…

make sure you have plenty of water, Smartwater has electrolytes which you will need to replenish. Vitamin B6, B12, C, and potassium supplements, especially the Bs. 5 hour energy shots without the caffeine, unless you’re a caffeine junkie. Eggs and hash browns, eggs have something called cystine or something, which helps, and hash browns are good and greasy. pepto bysmol, alka seltzer, maybe asparin. No “hair of the dog” aka more alcohol. Gatorade and snickers will get you through the day if, God forbid, you have to work. Barf if you feel the need, it helps. Watch comedies and take a nap.

Have the water, and a wastebasket next to your bed when you get home. Have fun and stay safe.

spoken like a true lush.

Anyone gonna suggest he go to the “gay Denny’s” at closing hour to get a Grand Slam?

[Frank_White]

@Snake Plissken

spoken like a true lush.

Anyone gonna suggest he go to the “gay Denny’s” at closing hour to get a Grand Slam?

Actually, you don’t want to eat too much before hand, or afterwards. Your body needs to process the alcohol, and “soaking it up” doesn’t help. Of course, going to Dennys at 2am drunk is a party in itself.

The taqueria on 24th and Mission in San Francisco is open till about 3:30 am, God I miss that place…

[Vieux_Normand]

Back to thread title: economic downturns begetting inventiveness, yours-truly is considering recipes for adding just enough carbs to protein-supplements to enable fermentation, then producing BULKOHOL.

Hulk get smashed, Hulk smash, all at once.

[100xobm]

@Big Dozer

I turn 21 next month and I am open to any suggestions. Most of my friend’s are goody goodies and those who arent are deployed at the moment. I have only gotten drunk once before and that was when I was 16. I picked a fight with 3 Marines who were kind enough to only break my arm. I havent drank since. But seeing that it is my 21st I feel I should celebrate in an appropriate manner. So I am open to any suggestions on what beverages I should start and/or finish on.

I’m not trying to sound like an ass here, but is this regular american practise?

I’m not trying to boast as NZ apparently is the binge drinking capital of the world, but drinking’s legal at 18 here, and I started at about fourteen or so. I’m not saying it’s a good thing, (especially as my job has ethical guidelines which I have to abide by now) but it is what it is. Is it normal not to drink until it’s legal? or even underage drinking, what’s the US’s context for that?

Anyway,
Remember not to buy a girl a drink unless she’s got a bump in the middle of her throat. They’re the ones who’re in heat.

[partyboy]

prairie fire

[hungryjoe]

Drink whatever is cheap.

You are going to be puking your guts out before the end of the night anyway.

Save the money for tomorrows breakfast. You’ll need it.