Can’t tell if you are serious or not…
Not crude at all IMO…many women are attracted to the “leader” of the group. This is the same reason even your local bar band will probably have at least a couple of females throwing themselves at the singer (or maybe guitarist if he takes a lot of spotlight) No Its not usually for their musical attributes, or the fantasy dude will ever be an arena rocking millionaire, but because he is confident and commands attention.
I have heard even odd professions like auctioneers have groupies…hell we’ve seen it again and again about preachers and you could blame religion or you could consider when a man is passionate about the same thing a woman is, but he stands up front and says sing, bow, cheer, laugh , cry and people do, he gains that power / leadership / protector role.
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I’ll work better on my sarcasm, LOL.
Thou shalt not crap where thou eateeth or whatever…
That sort of thing can lead to steady relationships? Sure. Have seen it happen several times in several places. Have seen it at the workplace, lots of times. But workplaces have laws for that kind of thing most everywhere now for reasons.
I had it happen myself. Never ended well.
Had it happen (to a still uncertain extent) to someone I knew. He ended up being brought up on charges. Then he killed himself.
When I first entered a supervisory role at 19 there was a manager who took me under his wing and I remember him telling me “never pork your payroll” .
Same meaning as crap where you eat .
I never have although I did entangle (shout out to Jada) with some in other departments on a similar level to myself on occasion but nothing sober or serious .
When I was learning to coach I remember a module talking about the emotional attachment that a candidate can develop for a person coaching them.
So I was aware that this was a potential pitfall in the process and was to be avoided and not exploited .
Martial arts instructors are not really thought any of that they are simply taught moves and when they are good enough teach those moves to others .
When that happens I think allot of them just think they are sexy man and earned sexy time .
Not even a little? What if it’s just the tip?
Joking about sexual assault?
Should I ban you or contact your mom?
Um, its not sexual assault to have sex with a student. And it’s not your place to make sure that BJJ instructors aren’t having sex. We aren’t property, which seems to confuse people. The demands are absurd. You can’t have sex, can’t keep your own money, can only associate with approved individuals, can only work at certain venues, can’t move freely, etc. Enough IS enough.
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Speaking personally, here, not on behalf of BS in any professional capacity:
Love is a many splendored thing. I have known many workplace romances that turned in to lifelong relationships.
The point of this is coercion. You should not trade sex for a better grade, or mat time, or reduced pay, or whatever the consequence du jour is. You will both always have to carry the cross of favoritism. And, unfortunately, a teacher/student relationship is always going to bear that scrutiny.
As a community, I think that’s what we oppose. The solution? Use common sense, do not screw over your other underlings, and keep it discrete and out of the workplace.
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I agree 100% on coercive sex. That is ALWAYS wrong.
Olympic movement has strict rules about coaches having sex with current students. Same with US NGBs. I had to sign a “I promise not to have sex with my students” paper when I got my coach certification in the US (a long time ago). Same thing in Canada.
IME, it’s not a good idea…to have sexual relations with your students.
Shit, it’s a bad idea.
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I was not addressing you. I was texting Dick Stryker.
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" … it’s not my place to make sure BJJ instructors aren’t having sex"? What the fuck are you talking about? Me saying I think it’s a bad idea and morally wrong does not mean I’m some kind of enforcer in the BJJ world. It’s an opinion. Maybe lay off the weed a bit there stoner.
I know you were talking to Stryker. I didn’t see an assault joke there.
I think actual conduct enforcement would be good in BJJ. Shit, what we need is LAW ENFORCEMENT, and I don’t mean training it. Some of these people should be arrested for their crimes.
Ya know what? I think it’s time to shut it down. Not BJJ the sport, but the cult built around it. They’re asking a ten year (!) commitment before you get your credentials and then using you along the way. I think that they should either be stopped from issuing credentials OR held to actual academic legal standards since they’re taking real money for this and utilizing the actual time of their victims. I’ve been all over since then and I’ve honestly never heard of an activity having THIS MUCH BULLSHIT. None of this is even legal. It’s almost all banned by local and federal laws. Can you imagine if this was all going down at your local Arby’s? People think this shit is like part of their membership package or some sort of Cobra Kai style add on series or something. It’s actually unethical/criminal behavior in the dojo. And it’s taking place in the dojo because no one cares and there are a large number of people willing to retaliate against the victims for status and popularity. Those amongst this mob that have day jobs don’t do this in their day jobs or family lives. It’s an escapist psycho thing. Hopefully this ends REALLY badly. In the meantime, there is basis for a federal investigation. It’s absurd. I mean the whole scene. Not any particular incident or incidences. I don’t think BJJ as a business is in an appropriate place at all.
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Take up judo dude
That shit is regulated
Judo is not without its own cult-y problems.
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Granted
As is boxing and most sports especially the higher you get
The lack of an effective regulatory body in any organisation facilitates malfeasance
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