jnp gets the clap

[QUOTE=jnp;3043635]Oh it gets worse. I can’t grill either.

Let me be clear. It’s not like I set extraneous things on fire when I grill. I am marginally passable when I grill. Can I grill par excellence? Sadly, the answer is no.

I am no good in the kitchen in general.

I can; build a house, wire a house, read blueprints, utilize geometry and trigonometry in commercial applications, use an axe with more than the standard proficiency, hunt with a bow or firearm, fish, build a shelter, survive in the woods, navigate with a compass, but I can’t cook my way out of a paper bag.

Compensation says what?[/QUOTE]
People that get in my car tend not to want me to be the driver on subsequent trips.

For some reason, my driving makes them nervous.

[QUOTE=Dr. Gonzo;3043638]People that get in my car tend not to want me to be the driver on subsequent trips.

For some reason, my driving makes them nervous.[/QUOTE]

I taught my wife to cook.

She rarely lets me drive. She actually flew from Austin to Oklahoma City, stopping in Houston rather than drive back with me and daughter #2 last July. We picked her up at the airport with her waiting about 15 minutes. $$$

Was driving instructor for both daughters. Wife white knuckles the steering wheel in traffic. She also can’t cook meat for shit. No matter how I try and explain time and temperature.

Impending divorce. A man can only take so much.

More in the too personal department, I’m also lacking in Samurai qualifications, specifically flower arranging. And footsweeps, can’t get good at those despite years of practice.

My father always stressed being a Renaissance man. Growing up, I added certain martial qualifiers heavily influenced by Samurai culture.

[QUOTE=submessenger;3043640]jnp, you ever do one of those “build a homeless family a house,” kinda deals? We should find something like that and tag-team it together, that would be hella fun.[/QUOTE]

See end of my last post. You guys do Oklahoma?

[QUOTE=hungryjoe;3043644]See end of my last post. You guys do Oklahoma?[/QUOTE]

With 4-6 weeks advance, I can make it happen. JNP can ride with me, and anything we can’t fit in the bed we can trailer.

Wait a second…

Are we coming to build your house for free?

[QUOTE=submessenger;3043646]With 4-6 weeks advance, I can make it happen. JNP can ride with me, and anything we can’t fit in the bed we can trailer.

Wait a second…

Are we coming to fix your house for free?[/QUOTE]

Would you do that too?

I’m finally getting my spot in the country. After we sell this place. Probably next year when daughter #2 graduates HS.

edit

Free? Hell no. I’ll provide the beer and food.

Lol

Just realized the thread I’ve come out in as going to be single again.

Oh damn. Talk about needing to read the latest posts before hitting the “Submit Reply” button . . .

[QUOTE=hungryjoe;3043649]Lol

Just realized the thread I’ve come out in as going to be single again.[/QUOTE]
It’s okay buddy. I can give you the clap now too.

[QUOTE=hungryjoe;3043647]Would you do that too?

I’m finally getting my spot in the country. After we sell this place. Probably next year when daughter #2 graduates HS.

edit

Free? Hell no. I’ll provide the beer and food.[/QUOTE]

I’d do it for you, sure. Keep me looped in. Seriously.

[QUOTE=jnp;3043650]Oh damn. Talk about needing to read the latest posts before hitting the “Submit Reply” button . . .[/QUOTE]

It’s all good. We had a good three decade run and part as friends.

[QUOTE=jnp;3043648]I might have done a bit of work for free in the past.[/QUOTE]

LOL - I wasn’t referring to being an “independent contractor.” It’s hard to pay the bills when others won’t pay yours.

[QUOTE=submessenger;3043653]I’d do it for you, sure. Keep me looped in. Seriously.[/QUOTE]

I’m joking. In an earlier life I worked in construction and know my way around electrical.

Was serious about the beer and food though.

Actually looking forward to the next chapter. All that good living BKR country porn has made me itchy.

[QUOTE=Dr. Gonzo;3043486]
I forgot JNP was a mod.

And a level headed gentlemen, who generally takes the high road in a respectable fashion.

As far as I am concerned, JNP is the Dr. Huxtable of this site, and I did not mean to malign him.[/QUOTE]

You are the Steven Urkel of this site.

[QUOTE=W. Rabbit;3049269]You are the Steven Urkel of this site.[/QUOTE]

I wear my pants high, so there is that.

[QUOTE=Dr. Gonzo;3049271]I wear my pants high, so there is that.[/QUOTE]

Disturbingly, Gonzo wears no pants when he’s sober. #thingsIshouldNotKnow

[QUOTE=submessenger;3049278]Disturbingly, Gonzo wears no pants when he’s sober. #thingsIshouldNotKnow[/QUOTE]
I like a good breeze on my nethers.

Thank you all for resurrecting this thread.

Then again, I wrote the thread title myself.

I’ve been having the worst time reading these posts. I really, really need to get new glasses.

[QUOTE=Dr. Gonzo;3049281]I like a good breeze on my nethers.[/QUOTE]

When your health has reached a certain threshold of trying to kill you, I recommend comfort at all times.

If I had my way it would be overalls, sweatpants and pajamas from here on out.