Escorts

Hello everyone, I come to you with this question because I have no experience in the matter and would like to hear some opinions and advise.

When getting and escort. Is better to go with an escort place or with a self employed escort?

What is proper escort etiquette? Do you offer them a drink when they show up or something?

A part of me wants to take this post seriously.

I am seriously asking. No joke.

craigslist ftw

OP…don’t come to a martial arts site looking for info on escorting. There are literally thousands of sites out there where you can find the most minute details about how to book an escort and what the norms around being a hobbyist (the term for people who use escorts) are.

If you do a simple search for…are you ready for this complicated query…“how to find an escort”…you will find plenty of information that will help you.

Regarding your question specifically…i.e…is it best to use an independent escort or an escort agency? That depends on exactly where you are located. Some cities are run by great agencies, and some cites you should stay as far away from agencies as you can.

FWIW…these are my opinions from working in the adult industry for the past 9 years. I’m currently the VP of one of the largest online adult directories in the world. We have well over 5000 escort ads online daily…for locations around the US, Canada and the UK.

Yes I’m awesome and your job sucks compared to mine. Good day.

[QUOTE=konosan;2703603]Hello everyone, I come to you with this question because I have no experience in the matter and would like to hear some opinions and advise.

When getting and escort. Is better to go with an escort place or with a self employed escort?

What is proper escort etiquette? Do you offer them a drink when they show up or something?[/QUOTE]I had a 1988 Escort GT, they quit making them in 2003.
[QUOTE=Bodhi108;2703608]A part of me wants to take this post seriously.[/QUOTE]Me, too, but it is a small part; people need help, so I’m going to try.
[QUOTE=konosan;2703613]I am seriously asking. No joke.[/QUOTE]Seriously??
[QUOTE=lordbd;2703618]craigslist ftw[/QUOTE]After you find what you’re looking for on Craigslist, be sure to verify at: http://www.angieslist.com/

[QUOTE=konosan;2703603]Hello everyone, I come to you with this question because I have no experience in the matter and would like to hear some opinions and advise.

When getting and escort. Is better to go with an escort place or with a self employed escort?

What is proper escort etiquette? Do you offer them a drink when they show up or something?[/QUOTE]

I think there are other forums on internet land more suited in solving your conundrum than one dedicated to debunking bullshido LOL!

Ok, I’m going to give you a couple different sets of advice. These come from a sex industry veteran and ex-boss, so take them for what they are worth. Bullet points are in caps:

First and most importantly, these women are hustlers. They will do anything in their power to take your money and not deliver the sex. They understand male psychology at a very basic animal level, and are absolutely adept at manipulating you against your will. They are proffesionals, they do this daily, it is their livelyhood. Their ultimate goal is to get as much money form you as possible with as little work or exposure on their end as possible. Keep in mind that on the lower 50% of this world they would rather rob you than give up the pussy, and this is on PRINCIPLE. The principle of the hustle. It’s a point of professional pride actually. Understand this well; You are chum and they are sharks.

With that in mind, here are your escort protocals:
Never mention sex on the phone. Ask for HOURLY RATE, and CANCELATION FEES. Here’s how that breaks down:
Hourly rate = what it will cost just for their company. This does not include anything they will do to you. That is negotiated in person once your base is paid. Expect to spend a LOT of money. Low end hand jobs run $100 - $250 once you take you’re whoring off the street. So expect to spen A LOT of money on top of the hourly. They might only give you a good “private show”. That definition is a whole other thread, and my personal area of professional expertise. It is a pure hustle, and the short explanation is YOU WILL NOT GET LAID.
Cancelation fee’s = Only hire escorts that do not have one. A cancelation fee is a red flag that what customers get is not usually what they are expecting. If they don’t have one they are hot enough that customers don’t cancel the dates often enough to hurt their profits.

NEVER EVER bring these women to your home. ALWAYS get a hotel room. These are underworld hustlers and you don’t want them reporting to their “manager” where you live and what you own. There are countless fringe hustles you can spin off of the seduction game. More than you can imagine, and they all involve taking advantage of somebody on top of the “service”. (Usually the customer, but not always. Hustlers rip each other off too…)

Jerk off before they come over. No matter how much time you contracted for, when you come, you are done. Get your baby batter out and your hormones down to a manageable level so you can get your monies worth of time.

Never leave them alone with your wallet or take your eyes off of your stacks for a single solitary second. Leave the room or fall asleep around them and they will take you for all that you have.

Last but not least. Don’t ever put your mouth on a whore. That’s just stupid.

Now for the important “life shit”.

You don’t really need to do this. Fuck being a custy, be a boss. Do you have any idea how easy it is to recruit whores? You will spend less effort and money setting up auditions for "your escort service or private dance studio (what I used to own) or prono production company or peep show or insert sex grift here. You won’t get 100% returns and fuck everybody that comes through the door. But you will get free lap dances at least. Good “impress you, Heffe” lap dances and a surprising percentage will try to leverage sex acts as well. In fact if you actually own any of these businesses and aren’t just scaming for pussy you will get access to any vice you can imagine prety much at will. It is a seductive and dangerous path to travel, but I guarantee you will experience things many young men can only dream of. If you’re lucky you can get out with body / soul / mind in tact. Most people sink into a hell of baited pleasures and distraction from which there is no escape. (You want to spend your whole life intimately involved with the people illustrated in my first paragraph?)

Third, you don’t even have to do ANY of the above;

Go out to whatever social spot has the young ladies looking for a good time. DO NOT “try” to hit on anybody. DO NOT “eyeball fuck” the hot girls. Simply enjoy yourself by yourself. When you talk to the beautiful women, be cool as a cucumber. Act as if you have no investment in wether or not you sleep with them. In fact, manifest that point of view. Simply enjoy their company for their company. Keep in mind that beautiful young women are USED to being hit on constantly. Try to fuck them outright and you are another douche in the crowd. Make eye contact, smile a little and casually break it without salivating and they start to wonder what’s up with you. Some will come around and flirt just because their ego drives them to get the attention that they are used to from other men. It becomes a point of pride. Stay cool. Enjoy things for what they are. Interation alone with the pretty ladies is something special and should be enjoyed for it’s own merrits. Be chill, be yourself, DON’T BE A HORNY PREDATOR and if you’re patient all kinds of women you think are out of your league will be giving you attention, grinding you on the dance floor and even inviting you home for the night. Returns are a low percentage, so DO NOT take things personal, or lose faith on a slow night. Some of the women you interact with will remember you and might even come arround on another night SO LONG AS YOU ARE ALWAYS SUPER COOL. Just enjoy yourself no matter what and BE PATIENT. The good things will come to you.

Good luck brother! (don’t get mugged)

[QUOTE=Mr. Machette;2703654]Ok, I’m going to give you a couple different sets of advice. These come from a sex industry veteran and ex-boss, so take them for what they are worth. [/QUOTE]That was quite the tutorial; I am impressed. Hopefully, I will never need this advice, but wow.

[QUOTE=slamdunc;2703662]That was quite the tutorial; I am impressed. Hopefully, I will never need this advice, but wow.

[/QUOTE]
Just know the game in your heart amigo!

The hustle is as old as male apes hording bannanas to trade for sexy time.

We are still animals in nature to some degree. Especialy when it comes to sexuality. Simply be secure in your manhood. Be a real mensch and you’ll do allright.

Give love to the world and receive it in kind. Pay a junkie for sex and get… …whatever…

[QUOTE=Southpaw;2703646]
FWIW…these are my opinions from working in the adult industry for the past 9 years. I’m currently the VP of one of the largest online adult directories in the world. We have well over 5000 escort ads online daily…for locations around the US, Canada and the UK.

Yes I’m awesome and your job sucks compared to mine. Good day.[/QUOTE]

O RLY? Motherfucker, you need to hook a fellow bully up! How about some good ole’ cronyism up in this bitch?

Shit, if you’re in Raleigh I’m right down the street. I dun been ta coledge and urrythang.

Workin in the ‘ho game sounds mo’ betta than the shit I do for a living. I can do just about anything where you need a fucking boss to run shit. Six figures and a nice office only. Director level or above.

Consider this my cover letter.

Turns out OP did ask in the right place after all.

Just to re-iterate, they are looking to use their “gifts” to take your money. One thing I love about the industry is I have been in it, at some level (customer, security, marketing) since I was about 17, so I know the games they play. I’ve had all the tactics pulled on me and, in the working environment, I am easily able to counter them.

I’ve had a stripper claim they had “never felt this way before about anyone” and saying, “I don’t want to see anyone else tonight, can you spend the rest of the night with me?” to which I laughed and told her she should just take my number and call me afterwards, which she did. I’ve had a hooker try to spend the entire time giving me back rubs, to which I had to sternly tell her “I’m not here for my sciatica, I’m here to bust a nut”. I’ve fucked some escorts into oblivion, to the point where they tapped out from pleasure saying they can’t handle any more orgasms and resulted in me telling them that they “owe me for my time”.

Then I did the stupid thing and got involved with someone who claimed they had left that life. She was the biggest whore of them all and I let my guard down because it wasn’t the working environment and I trusted that people can change their ways. Worst mistake I have ever made. I will never trust a woman who has or is working in the industry, even though I am friends with some even now.

The adult industry promises a lot and delivers very little. Escorts will be the most unsatisfactory experience of your adult life, even if she is hot and enthusiastic. Trust me on this, even the most wild, base, catered specifically to your fantasy animalistic sex will end and you will leave with an empty feeling deeper than the one you had when you thought sex would cure. I read a study on it recently, that something like 90% of return customers are unsatisfied, but still go. I’m talking from experience though.

It’s much, much better to find a woman IRL, one you can trust. Sex is better with one you can trust.

Also, I fucking hate condoms.

[QUOTE=battlefields;2703894]
The adult industry promises a lot and delivers very little. Escorts will be the most unsatisfactory experience of your adult life, even if she is hot and enthusiastic. Trust me on this, even the most wild, base, catered specifically to your fantasy animalistic sex will end and you will leave with an empty feeling deeper than the one you had when you thought sex would cure. I read a study on it recently, that something like 90% of return customers are unsatisfied, but still go. I’m talking from experience though.

It’s much, much better to find a woman IRL, one you can trust. Sex is better with one you can trust.

Also, I fucking hate condoms.[/QUOTE]

Word.

Gawd…I am going to go home and tell my Wife that I love her…

[QUOTE=battlefields;2703894]
I’ve had a stripper claim they had “never felt this way before about anyone” and saying, “I don’t want to see anyone else tonight, can you spend the rest of the night with me?” to which I laughed and told her she should just take my number and call me afterwards, which she did. I’ve had a hooker try to spend the entire time giving me back rubs, to which I had to sternly tell her “I’m not here for my sciatica, I’m here to bust a nut”. .
[/quote]

That’s clever and shit, mayne. Fuck prostitutes, trying to be alone with your expensive shit and whatnot. Ain’t no ho getting near my Water Lillies Reproduction. Ho’s don’t know bout no Impressionism and shit.

Then I did the stupid thing and got involved with someone who claimed they had left that life. She was the biggest whore of them all and I let my guard down because it wasn’t the working environment and I trusted that people can change their ways. Worst mistake I have ever made. I will never trust a woman who has or is working in the industry, even though I am friends with some even now.

Ho’s can’t change, man. Once a ho, always a ho. Can’t turn a ho into a housewife etc. Reach up in the sky for the ho-zone layer.

I’ve fucked some escorts into oblivion, to the point where they tapped out from pleasure saying they can’t handle any more orgasms and resulted in me telling them that they “owe me for my time

You fucking liar. Tapped out from pleasure? This sounds like some shit that starts with “Dear Penthouse”.
What’s your secret?

The adult industry promises a lot and delivers very little. Escorts will be the most unsatisfactory experience of your adult life, even if she is hot and enthusiastic. Trust me on this, even the most wild, base, catered specifically to your fantasy animalistic sex will end and you will leave with an empty feeling deeper than the one you had when you thought sex would cure. I read a study on it recently, that something like 90% of return customers are unsatisfied, but still go. I’m talking from experience though.

I thought sex could cure all the problems and shit. Fuck. I must have been mislead by society and television advertising.

It’s much, much better to find a woman IRL, one you can trust. Sex is better with one you can trust.

Also, I fucking hate condoms.

But finding a woman in real life is so hard. You have to talk to them and shit. That’s fucking terrifying, son.

Also, condoms increase your latency time by like 35%. That means you last about 35 seconds longer. And you want to put as much time delay between penetration and post-coital crying as possible.

Everything I need to know about the sex trade I learned from my good friend Kevin Moore, adult film director, actor, and longtime AVN contributor.

It’s all about the fantasy man, so it’s really just all in your head.

You can always get what you need without paying for it.

//youtu.be/dw1oM7LBbxE

[QUOTE=The Question;2704117]
You fucking liar. Tapped out from pleasure? This sounds like some shit that starts with “Dear Penthouse”.
What’s your secret?
[/QUOTE]

It wasn’t “pleasure”; they were suffocating under layers of flab.

Or as rapper Prime once said

Life is like an erection and some ass
It feels real good, but it don’t last

[QUOTE=Mr. Machette;2703654]Ok, I’m going to give you a couple different sets of advice. These come from a sex industry veteran and ex-boss, so take them for what they are worth. Bullet points are in caps:

The good things will come to you.

Good luck brother! (don’t get mugged)[/QUOTE]

Best post ever. Hang out, have fun, don’t try. Most women are tremendously insecure and the best way to play on that is to not be interested.

[QUOTE=RhinoUP;2704138]Most women are tremendously insecure[/QUOTE]

And they’re also fickle, timid, weak minded, unreliable, can’t drive and suck at math. Amirite?