A Master such as he never wins, he just remains ever vigilant. Especially with: On the toilet, asleep and having sex which are noted to be the three most vulnerable points in life (As HE who is ELMORE so decreed)
I Am RBSD, And So Can You!
Phil Elmore looks like a bloke I used to work with, who probably like Elmore could go on for hours and hours about Sci-Fi, gadgets and his DVD collection. occasionally he used to call me darling and put his head on my shoulder. It was always totally baffling to have a very fat chap trying to rest his puffy face on my shoulder and sighing contentedly in the middle of an open plan office. He has gone now, for the moment anyway, but seeing the Elmore has brought it all back.
Holy crap, it’s one of the lizard-men from the 80s sci-fi mini-series “V!”
Oh wait, it’s just Phil Elmore…
When the stars are right, he shall arise in his true form and the world will be awash in madness.
The face-tentacles will be a definite improvement.
Woe to those without homes and colored skin.
what area of the US can you walk around with a sward ?
Duh, you’re supposed to hide it in your totally badass leather trenchcoat.
Barring that (like, if you know how to dress), you can always carry around a giant baguette and hide your sword in it.
The whole sword as a concealed weapon thing cracks me up.
Just finished reading the book “Florida Firearms Law use and ownership” which covers Florida concealed weapon law. I’m no attorney but as far as I can tell according to FLorida law you could conceal a sword legally if you had a permit for ccw (without a permit it would be a felony). But, drawing the sword in response to anything other than a forcible felony would be considered as assault and would most likely get you arrested. For example if a guy started to verbally harass you on the street and you drew the sword he could call the police and get you in big trouble. Among other things you would most likely lose your ccw permit. If someone attacked you with bare hands and you respond with a sword chop your looking at some prison time. If multiple people attacked you or if an armed person went after you then you may be ok. If someone saw your sword poking out from under your jacket you could get into trouble for brandishing especially if you flashed it at them with a verbal threat.
As far as I can tell, under florida law there is no provision that allows you to threaten an attacker that you don’t already have the authotity to attack. For example, if a guy pulls a knife you can pull a sword but if you think the guy might pull a knife you can’t pull a sword and threaten him with it.
My point is that all practicality aside, a sword for self defence is pretty likely to get you in jail where you won’t have a sword and there are plenty of bad guys. Probably not a good plan. A common pocket knife, which doesn’t require a permit in the state of florida, is probably a better plan.
Anyone looking to carry any sort of weapon should read a book covering the laws or you could get into some big trouble. For example, pointing a pistol at an unarmed assailant in Florida - 3 years prison, even if the guy was a total A-hole and deserved it.
I’m no attorney, get legal advice from an attorney if you need it.
The one area where I could see some practicality for the sword self defence thing would be if it was for use in the home and someone had a concearn about the safety of having a handgun in the home with childeren or if for some legal reason (maybe they live in an area where guns are banned) they can’t own a gun. A lot of people keep a baseball bat around for a similar reason. The upside of a bat is that you can argue in court that it’s for baseball while a sword is kind of purpose built.
In some ways I can relate to Elmore and his paranioa. Honestly, I think everyone can.
This type of stuff was much more popular 10 years ago than it is today. Not sure what happened. Don’t care really.
As they say in a couple of places I’ve worked in: just hoop it.
Nothing to do with basketball; considerable reconstructive proctology will be required afterward.
new to the site. the posts are great, but I feel like a punk. what is RBSD?
The sword is so cool. Hitting the Mall to get me one, April Fools or not. Suh-weet street defense. I’m protected 3-4 feet out!
Reality
Based
Self-
Defense
or RBSD for short. Hope that answers your question.
To prevent any confusion:
There’s nothing wrong with reality-based self defense. The problem is, RBSD is none of the above.
Thanks, Zen. I feel like less of a punk already. Not a lot, but every bit helps.
I agree, nothing wrong with reality-based self defense. On the subject, my policeman buddies almost always say “stay out of trouble”. I know what they mean, but sometimes trouble arrives on it’s own.
Like the time my small town was invaded by zombies. They did catch me off guard, but luckily, I had a samurai sword (bought at a mall nearby), which I used to dispatch 2 or 3 thousand zombies. Didn’t feel tired until the movie was over.
I’m going to write a book about it. “Real Streets, Real Zombies - Sharpen Your Skills and Stay Alive!”
names were changed to protect the innocent. No invertibrates were harmed in the typing of this post except a mosquito that got squished.
Really Bad Sumo Derivative is what it means in my case. Use everything that’s favourable, including size relative to most adversaries. RBSD against zombies? That’s different: use speed relative to adversaries–if you see them ambling towards you at their usual pace, GTFO by walking a little faster.
The “R” part of RBSD determines what sort of training you do. People train for different reasons (AKA different “realities”), but a basic principle of kinesiology is that, the more closely your training resembles situations you’re going to face, the more effective that training is. If you’re never going to fight, anything will do. If you’re a sport fighter, your combat-sport of choice is what you train for. A third “reality” might be that you’re engaged in an occupation where you’ll have to deal with uncooperative inmates, suspects, bar-brawlers (about whom you know nothing, including their training if any) or the like. If so, you will need to know how to take the fight out of them both effectively and legally. In such a job, you’re in a position of responsibility and, as everyone has cell-vid these days, assume what you do will be recorded.
Opinion: the best training for this includes a lot of live practice against fully-resisting opponents, knowing how to fall and roll on hard surfaces, full-contact sparring and any other training which mimics, as much as possible, on-the-job situations you’re likely to encounter some time during your career. It does NOT mean running around the woods with a shopping-mall-purchased sword in your hands–which is as far from reality as anyone is likely to get.
Also, “too deadly for sparring” is a non-sequitur. You can practice, for example, kata-guruma/fireman’s/clean-and-jerk-the-jerk in randori. There, one lands him on a bit differently than you might in a real situation, but the adjustment is so slight that randori is not only useful but essential. An armbar can be practised via the tap as preparation for the use of pain-compliant restraint on the job, or a slight adjustment can have you going for an immediate snap if the situation calls for it. As long as you can justify your actions to a judge…
As for striking, one example: as far as I know, there are no types of MMA which forbid Fairbairn’s open-handed “chin-jab”, but why not just learn to jab and condition your knuckles accordingly?
“Deadly eye attacks”? Over-rated unless you’ve immobilized your opponent’s head long enough to dig those digits in (in which case, you’re better off with a restraint that won’t piss off the aforementioned judge). Otherwise, on a moving adversary, good luck. Anyway, you can either try the eye-hits with a sparring partner in safety goggles, or you can learn some effective boxing which, in combination with some throws and cranks, will take the fight out of a belligerent idiot.
Weapons-disarms? Shock-knives (or just practice-blades marked with ink to see where you get cut) in the hands of partners who are actually trying, at full speed, to “cut” you. Practice-guns that actually discharge something that will mark you. These sorts of tools, used in scenarios by adversaries who know how to use them, will tell you whether or not your disarms are any good.
Multiple-opponents? Train realistically, with all of them rushing you at once instead of one at a time. You’ll see if your multiple-opponent-related training has been any good. Better to learn it in-house, via hard sessions, than “out there”, which may well turn out to be even harder.
Bottom line is, unless you test your RBSD (or whatever) against people who are really fighting, sparring, rolling with you, there is little or no “reality” to it. Why a lot of stuff is called “RBSD” without any realistic testing is beyond me…it’s rather (oxy)moronic. Another thing I’ve observed (whether it’s true or not) concerns effects on your character and outlook. The more a person has tested his training against actually-fighting and fully-resisting partners, the less he comes off like a paranoid little pudgemuffin running and leaping, wide-eyed, around forested areas, sword in hand. When things have been put to the live-training test, there is less of the insecurity that comes with the uncertainty of untested moves.
Spar. Roll. Bring “real” to your “reality”. Besides, sparring is fun. Everyone likes fun.
Phrost! Pull your head out of your ass! You’ll need your street sword skills when the hordes of Gracie trained ethnic Zombies roll out into the 'burbs!
You won’t be safe!
NO ONE WILL! Unless they prepare now!
I suggest learning RBSD, the r3al JKD, and buying every gun that federal law will allow!
Where you gonna be when Jesus comes? Well, wherever it is be ready with Elmore’s book, some JKD DVDs, and an assault rifle!
God help us all!
Who’s paranoid? Just because you are paranoid don’t mean they ain’t out to get you! The Freemasons run the country!
POtatoe salad! :qright6: :new_snipe :qleft7: :redx: :XXbazooka :qright1: :phil2: :qleft1: :qright2: :XXbirdman :new_2guns :jihad1: :jihad:
Dude, it’s Stephen Colbert.
Don’t make him smite you in all his awesomeness.
Uuh, has he said it himself?
Phrost, I’m accusing you and your staff of intellectual slothfulness. Quit reaching and do a piece on something that requires research.
Of course! This is why he bans people at the drop of a hat. It’s so we don’t mess up his act, it’s all so clear now.