Whoever it was who invited me to the party a few weeks ago in the middle of nowhere so that me and my cousin ended up wandering in the cold untill we found a people carrier full of other friends going to the same party - you suck
Whoever it was who drank all the sambucca and vodka that i love and the leffe and baileys that my cousin loves before we arrived - you suck
The friend who brought along methylated spirits AS A DRINK and offered it to everyone including my drunken, inhibition lacking self - you’re fucking awesome in an evil evil way. That was nearly as crazy as the time you sold rook scarers (mini firecrackers) to all of the half dumb - half dropout kids back in junior high (but thats another story).
The person who left a bowl full of vodka jelly out on the nearly empty drinks table that left me and my cousin significantly worse for wear - you suck
Everyone at the party apart from me and my cus who drank all the booze but the cocktail, tesco value and ritch’s farm cider (both smell like apple flavoured flatuence) - you suck. All of you.
Sensimellia, maker of that cocktail. When making a new drink with fruit and blended solids in it, try to make sure that you use ingredients that will puree and not look like chunks. Do not add unpeeled apple, it will look like curry vomit and will suck. - However, since it didn’t taste half bad, was the only good tasting drink after the drinks table had been looted left and i was willing to drink it you’re not a bitch.
Dan, the host of the party - you suck for not revealing the location of your parents wine rack untill i had drank meths, jelly and odd cocktails and wasn’t really in the mood for any more booze. Apart from that, sweet party mate.
Really drunk fit girl who i pulled and kept knocking her teeth against mine - you suck at kissing. At least i think it was you who kept knocking teeth and not me, although i’m not totally sure… Anyway, you probably suck.
Fat blonde weird looking guy who pulled that girl before me and apparently pulls that girl at every party they attend - you suck. How am i supposed to know if that girl pulled me because i’m slick or because she just pulls everyone? Thanks for fucking up a geek’s confidence, you fat bastard.
Kris, the fat, camp and fashionably dressed bulgarian. You suck on principle.
My short, blonde and slightly chubby friend who was pulling and god-knows-what-elsing the slighlty odd looking girl who was very, very, very drunk - you suck because the girl i was pulling was that girls friend, and kept dragging me into your room making sure you weren’t molesting her which gave me less pulling time
The two UFC guys on the telly who spent the entire time that i was in that room clinching - YOU SUCK!! HIT, OR ELBOW OR TAKEDOWN OR FUCKING SOMETHING YOU LAZY BASTARDS I’M FUCKING BORED!
My best friend who arrived to the party, unfashionably late, after all the booze had been consumed and after all the good bits were over - you suck.
The guy who gave my best friend who gave my friend enough italian almond liqueur to lower his inhibitions but not enough that he wouldn’t be bored and misbehave - you suck
My best friend who proceeded in his boredom to slop yoghurt on the comatose drunks’ feet, add curry powder and cream and detox to the cocktail with a bunch of emo kids, slop yoghurt on all of the door handles, set a 6ft6 rugby player’s playing cards on fire, trying to set one of his best friend’s girlfriend’s shoes on fire after pouring beer in them and a host of other irritating behavior - you suck
Whoever gave my cousin the final drink that pushed him over the edge from very very drunk into throwing up drunk - you suck
My cousin who threw up in my mums car dispelling any illusion that i might have done what i was asked to do, looked after him and stopped him from getting totally wankered - you don’t suck, but only because you’re family. if it was ANYONE ELSE…
That was the tale of the best party in of 2007, theme ripped from TuckerMax
Please use this thread as a repository for your memories of your best parties and nights out of 2007, and copious praise for my post lol.