woah nelly, this thread made me remember some stuff from my kung fu days that I think I intentionally blocked from my memory.
Oh, the horror.
I actually dug out my old kung fu manuals and will transcribe them as they are presented here. any of my own comments will be in [brackets].
As a note, these come from Glenn C Wilson’s ‘Gong Yuen Chuan Fa’ system that is essentially kung fu forms tacked on to hideous kempo bullshit, hence the absurd names for techniques.
enjoy!
Thunder & Earth:
Counter: Person grabbing by both lapels or both shoulders from the front. From neutral stance with both hands down by sides.
- right knee comes up into crane stance [one leg] while executing double outward yuen chuan crossing wings block [open hand double center block] and a right front snap kick (moving opponent back)
- While stepping down into a right leg forward long bow stance, form right hand into fist keeping the right arm in front of right chest (elbow bent) and extend left willow palm to position using as a guide.
- Step through into left leg forward long bow stance while executing a right overhead hammerfist to the crown of the opponent’s nose and chambering left fist at waist.
- Slide right hand to the side of opponent’s head (to hold it) while stepping through to a right leg forward long bow stance, executing a left elbow strike to the opponent’s temple.
Yielding Fire
Counter: someone coming up behind you and grabbing you around the neck in a choke hold.
- Grab attacker’s arm righ your right hand (pinning attacker’s hand to your body)
- step into square horse stance to gain control of attacker’s balance, then step your left leg behind attacker’s right leg (still in horse stance) (do not step too far, you’ll loose [sic] your leverage). The right hand is still holding attacker’s arm to your body by your throat.
- Still holding the attacker’s arm in place, execute a left elbow strike to the attacker’s mid-section, then a left hammerfist into the attacker’s groin, then a left poison snake strike [think 3-stooges eye poke] into the attacker’s eyes.
Bite of the Viper
Counter: front snap kick
- Step back with left foot into side horse stance executing downward gong chuan crane crossing wings (with right fist on top) [X-block] to block attacker’s kick and draw the attacker towards you. (make sure the arms are crossed midway between the wrists and elbows)
- Leaving the left fist in place, chamber the right fist then execute a right sunfist [vertical punch] to the ribs, recoil the punch, then execute a right leopard’s paw uppercut to the throat.
Removing the Jewels [you already know this will be a doozy]
Counter: Someone coming from behing and grabbing you in a headlock. (attacker is on your left)
- Turn head to the left to clear air way, Using the finger knuckles of your right fist, strike the back of the attacker’s hand to loosen the grip.
- Step right into square horse stance and execute a left uppercut to the attacker’s ribs. Right fist is still at your left shoulder.
- Turn stance left into left leg forward long bow, and grabbing attacker’s groin with a right tiger claw. Left hand simultaniously chambers palm up at right shoulder.
- Rip & Tear, transferring the weight to the right leg into a stretching tiger stance and clearing the left hand down the right arm and striking with a noni slap (back-hand) to the groin while the right hand rips out the attacker’s groin [through their pants no less] and ends with the elbow bent in a 45 degree angle over the right side of your body about shoulder high. (right hand in a fist) (over emphasize the last stance) [so you look super cool]
Hidden Spear
Counter: One handed shoulder grab from behind [aka: excuse me, do you know the way to HUUURKKK]
- Step right foot across to left on a 45 degree angle bringing both spear hands up (palms facing down).
- Turn left 180 degrees to a left leg forward cat stance on opposite 45 bringing spears around blocking attacker’s arm with your left forearm.
- Hook left hand over attacker’s arm, grab, twist attacker’s arm, and pull attacker into your left side kick [ah yes, clinching range, the best time to throw a side kick]
- Set your left side heel back across the front of your right leg into monkey stance (similar to snake), while releasing the grab, cricle arms down, around, then striking down on atacker’s back with elbows, heel palms, then tiger claws. [imagine this as a flurry of strikes done to the exposed back of the attacker, rendered immobile and helpless by a well placed side kick]
Escaping Sparrow
Counter: Right wrist grab from attacker’s right hand
- Step over left food out and forward to left on a 45 degree angle. Circle right arm to left up, and over. When right arm is coming to the overhead position, hook your right hand over attacker’s grabbing arm with a crane’s beak, then continue circle downat 45 degree angle twisting stance right to a right leg forward open bow stance and bringing a left crane’s head around striking attacker’s head.
(You should end in a right leg forward open bow with your left crane’s head strike to the attacker’s head and right crane’s beak extended on your right downward at a 45) [so you look cool]
Pushing the Circle
Counter: Right wrist grab from attacker’s left hand.
- Step right foot forward to right on a 45 degree angle while turning your palm inward and pushing your hand toward attacker.
- Circle right arm overhead to the left to break the hold, turning stance to a right leg forward side horse. Continue the circle striking the attacker’s midsection with a right supported elbow strike (left hand covering right ribs).
- From supported elbow position, execute a right outside wing strike [karate chop? I dunno] (palm down) to the attacker’s neck. Then recoil strike and execute a downward reverse outside wing strike to the attacker’s groin (left hand still in right rib guard position).
Anyway I’m sure you won’t read this crap, but if you shut your eyes and imagine ridiculous strings of kempo-themed strikes against a limp and lifeless attacker, you’ll get the idea.
- daGorilla