Welome to the Armed&Hammered All American Martial Arts Acadamy
With our comprehensive, in depth, all encompasing, exclusive, mind-blowing, one hour training seminar, you’ll unlock your infinite potential. Our core system was developed by the most powerful people on the planet. Our trifecta of arts is the most extreme system in the world.
George Bush-ido & The Art of the Missile Ki - you will learn: How to make up your own language that everyone understands & how to become impervious to mental attacks.
Upon mastery: You’ll be able to manipulate anybody anywhere & even vanquish entire armies without ever moving a muscle!!!
Elvis Ryu Crotty & The Pelvis of Power - you will learn: How to break hearts with an intense pelvic thrust and how to become unaffected by alchohol or drugs.
Upon mastery: You’ll be able to change entire cultures and even become immortal.
Madonna Fu - Enter the 4 Finger Fist! - you will learn: The 1000 Vogue Stances and How to bounce nuts off your chin & make them explode!!
Upon mastery: You’ll never grow old and have an infinite supply of wealth!!!
As you can see under the direct supervision of grandmaster Xenu, you will become even more powerful than Tom Cruise, Ashida Kim or The Great Phil Elmore!!!
This seminar is a once in a lifetime offer and can be yours for the rock bottom price of 1 case of beer or the Armed&Hammered avatar.
Armed&Hammered and it’s affiliates are not affilated with any person,place,thing or anything aforementioned within existance or otherwise.