I have decided to create a this thread to act like a vault (or the internet equivilent anyways, apart from the fact that a vault is used to secure information wheras this is the complete opposite, but overlook that and you will find the analogy functions quite well, remember you can’t spell analogy without anal) in which my immense knowledge of the universe can be stored, as a demonstration of my incredible intellectual ability I have placed this thread in trollshido, where government organisations who would have this data surpressed will not think to look, right about now you are probably feeling intimidated by my greatness, but don’t worry this will soon recede to mere awe.
Shemales are no laughing matter, always check the hair line before you take ‘her’ home, preferably you should check both hair lines but in some cultures thats likely to get you slapped.
Remember never to tune you’re lamellophone near a copper plated bowl, otherwise you may risk having the sonic energy refracted into your feet nullifying any dancing ability you might have, those who do not have any noteworthy ability to dance and are not over three months pregnant will not be effected.
Mirrors do have many beneficial uses, but if you suddenly turn into a vampire while staring into one you may pass out from shock and injure yourself in the fall, wearing a foam helmet when using a mirror is a good way to prevent this from happening, all the better if the helmet is coated in garlic spray.
Manchuria:
What are your views on:
Gay Marriage
cats and dogs, living together
Condoms VS saran wrap
Jlo mariiage to Marc Anthony
Will Royce Gracie run for mayor ?
If somebody rings you looking for Archie they are really putting a ancient Himalayan curse on you, those bearing the christian name Archie are advised to seek counselling for their dysfunctional family.
Anybody married to someone by the name of Gay should call the police immediately, or else it may develope into the ‘Archie syndrome’, these things are best caught early.
Dogs will often establish a totalitarian relationship with cats, but occasionally the cats will have a cultural revolution where they able to secure much more capital than the dogs, unfortunately the cat model of economics is internally weak and requires constant expansion, often forming what is referred to as a ‘catnip curtain’, before you know it the cats are developing weird sexual fetishes and building internment camps for the dogs, I reccomend some good porn to take your mind off the issue.
Condoms and saran wrap are both good choices, but i reccomend using the cardboard roll the wrap comes with, this eliminates the need for a partner at all.
J-Lo is satan, eater of worlds, however she may have met her match when faced with this great roman leader.
Royce Gracie will have a mediocre career in politics until he meets Bill Clinton at a rally, upon Clinton pronouncing his name ‘roycee graky’ Royce will execute a flying armbar, it will be later discovered that via a strange and previously undiscovered amendment this automatically makes him the president of the united states, historians attribute this to Roosevelt.
You can save money on weight by lifting half the weight twice as high, I recommend all serious bodybuilders move into skyscrapers to fully capitalise on this.
People with green eyes should train their feet to be an additional set of hands, if the entire population did this, however, the bottom would fall out of the ‘nike slave labour sport shoe’ market forcing hundreds of small and tortured children to instead take up basket weaking, this would result in the entire asian continent being swamped in unused baskets, since the skill of swimming through a sea of baskets has never been trained thoroughly enough people would start to drown by the millions. Sooner or later somebody in china would hit the big red ‘nuke’ button because they are tired of living in a continent covered in baskets, this would cause the destruction of all western culture except for a cactus farmer named ‘Neville’ in Arizona, unfortunately before Neville could ensure the survival of the noble skill that is cactus farming he would be killed by a rabid lithop.
Knocking on wood for luck evolved from the druid custom of touching trees for luck, but since wood is really the desecrated body of a tree what you generate is actually ‘anti luck’. Wrecking balls use this principle, knocking on the wood very hard to generate enough anti luck so that the building will just fall down.
The royal family was originally designed by a mad scientist as a living set of furniture, things went awry when the scientist’s pet cockatiel named fluffy broke free and gnawed a hole in the compression chamber.
It depends how many security guards the store has, in the more popular malls I have been able to get away with as many as five bottles stuffed down my pants however.
The most logical explanation for Hannibal is that he has been transporeted through time as was illustrated in the terminator movies, note though that only machines would have actually ‘living’ hair, I presume they derived it from a lichen, wheras the external hair of humans is dead, therefore we are forced to conclude that Kyle Reese was mechanised attack squad and sent through time to pump Sarah Connor full of cyber-sperm. Since I didnt see the Carthaginian lord come out of time travel I can’t assess his hair state at the time to say for certain wether he is a terminator or not, all we know for certain is that circa 1991 he appeared and began eating people before escaping into the night, you will have to ask Hannibal himself to discover his motives for posting here.
I take anything that isn’t nailed down (and some things that are if I remember to bring a claw hammer), I use them to construct a bower from which I may perform my mating dance, you cannot touch it its mine, MINE!
