Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. I’m fucked up. There’s a company mini party going on right now, and I’m sitting at my desk because I’m fucked up. Seriously. I am fucked up. The worst part is that I have to do some experiments and shit before I go home. Shit, I can’t even see right. I hope I don’t blow anything up.
Anyway, all I’ve had so far is like 2 beers. 2 motherfucking beers. That Pale Ale shit is the bomb, by the way. But seriously, for reals. Like rilly. Why am I so fucked up after 2 beers? More importantly, why am I still drinking. Oh well, whatever, mayne. I hear they have sushi, maybe the pickled ginger will help me regain my consciousness and sanity and shit.
Hell yes, though. Hell motherfucking yes. Also, why can’t I drink 6 beers and be fine like normal people? I’m like 200 pounds and I can’t drink 2 beers? Shit.
During college I could drink with the best of them. (Small, liberal arts school with jack shit to do but drink.)
Then I married a non-drinker. Like you guys, I’m about 205 lbs. and two beers is enough to get me sufficiently buzzed. But most of the time beer just puts me to sleep.
But did you ever have to do go some chemical shit while extremely fucked up? I think this is going to be the best evening of experiments ever. I’m going to get me another bottle of Samuel Adams Summer Ale ™, and routinely leave the lab area to stay buzzed.
Because my desk is where I keep the buzz, like the edge of my sink
In my bathroom where I groom shit
I’m bout to blow up like some Duke Nuken or Doom shit.
But seriously, why do cats make fun of people who can’t “hold their liquor”? Fuck that shit, I just got fucked up of 2.5 beers. That’s much less work for the same result. Ahhh, this is good. This is good. Now off I go.
Man, I don’t know what it is, but I think I like the Pale Ale better. Seriously. I think the bitterness is good for relaxing after work. Speaking of work … gotta fucking rowl.
So is this a whining thread or you want some help?
It isn’t uncommon for people who rarely drink to be like this. Especially us people that train SO HARD and don’t do things that will negatively impact our physical recovery!
Having a lower tolerance is great, it really saves a lot of money. I hear people boast able being able to have a 24 by themselves, I look at them in pity. They lose that confident smile when I wonder how much it must cost for them to get drunk.
Off the top of my head:
-Eat before you drink. Food slows absorption of alcohol. You can even eat during.
-Alternate drinks. One beer, one ice tea or water. Easier to hide if you are using the same cups.
-Smaller sips. At a party you can/should move around so one will notice you aren’t drinking ‘the same amount’ as them.
You aren’t as think as you drunk you are if you can type like that.
I know, right. Shit, it’s fucking amazing, man. I don’t feel very clear, and I can barely see the screen, but my shit’s still impeccable. It was the same thing when I was high. Maybe drugs and alcohol aren’t as bad as I was told they were. Shit.
And dammit, I love this Summer Ale shit. This is a beautiful evening. Beautiful.
Dude, the only time I wine is on the dance floor (yeah, that’s a Caribbean joke).
But for reals, it’s just pretty interesting. I’m not wasted to the point of throwing up, but my motor functions are a bit delayed. And the strangest thing is that I’m not pissed off about having to be at work late.
Dude, I used to date this girl who weighed like 130lbs or something. Drank me under the table everytime. I did sideflips and aerials all the way to her house.
Getting drunk off of a few beers dosnt make you less of a man. But not being able to hold your liqour… not matter the amount, is what makes you a bitch. So know your limits ladys and gents! And dont be ‘that guy’ who crys about how much he loves all his homeys as he grabs there shoulder over and over again. Everyone secretly wants to break your jaw.
It takes me so fucking long to get drunk that I don’t really notice when I am… until I start trying to wrestle everyone… which usually ends with me getting choked or punched in the nuts.
i wholeheartedly approve of this thread. question, enjoy your cheap drunk while you can. tolerance for beer develops quickly, soon you’ll be ordering pitchers in a bar and knocking down 7 or 8 glasses like it’s no problem.
kind of like i just did. cold beer, chicken wings, sports on tv. good looking wife at home.
welcome to manhood.
and btw, the only people that worry about how much they can or can’t drink usually can’t drink a whole lot. it’s not so much about getting a buzz or getting drunk, it’s how you act when you engage in those activities that separates the amateurs from the pros.
you’ll find that there are times in life when being able to maintain is a very valuable skill. develop it now, plus, it’s fun.
I’ve never understood guys who get either really violent or really weepy/emotional when they drink.
When I’m drunk I feel good.
If getting drunk doesn’t make you feel good, then quit fucking drinking. The rest of us don’t want to bail your ass out of jail or hear about the girl who broke your heart in at the junior high prom.