Discussion thread for List of methods to avoid challenges. If you would like to add a comment, click the Post Reply button
Ok, I got the ball rolling on this. Feel free to add more as you see them.
#2: don’t be a dick on the internet.
the article needs a more explicit title. the intent is prejudicial, and the title should match - simply avoiding challenge matches isn’t exactly a bad thing.
#3 Play the gender or weight card
Say it would be unfair to fight somebody of the other/same sex and maybe add that you have a weight disadvantage of 10 lbs that will lead to your shit not working.
“List of excuses to avoid challenges” is fairly succinct.
#4 Demanding to be paid money to fight, especially demanding a ridiculous amount
I’m not sure what’s prejudicial about it. The header section explicitly mentions that the simplest way to avoid a challenge is to decline.
I’m not going to put a number in front of this one, because from what I’ve seen on here (and other forums), it belongs at #1. Or maybe #2.
Ridiculous demands. The logistics-based version of raising the stakes.
Party A : Let’s do this in a month’s time at my dojo.
Party B : No, let’s do this tomorrow in a secret underground fight club I know about in [insert far-flung corner of multiverse].
Party A : That’s unreasonable.
Party B : OMG YOU’RE DUCKING ME. COWARD I WIN I WIN [furiously blog]
Oh, and comedy option… best way to avoid challenge fights?
Join the ACA.
How about this if you don’t want to be challenged then don’t post on BULLSHIDO because some dumb ass will allways try to make themselves look tougher by picking on someone else. It is just how people are.
All the cowardly methods for ensuring that a challenge match does not take place are probably within the threads of this site.
#x. Insist that the match take place in an area with “restricted access” (military base)
Insist that the challenger divulge personal information and get a background check for match to take place on said “restricted access” area.
#x. Insist on very unique fight conditions that your challenger is unlikely to be prepared for, ie fighting on ice while wearing ice skate, fighting in a swimming pool, etc
#x. Mention that people with guns will be there.
#x. Claim that your fighting techniques are too deadly for challenge matches
#x. Claim that you don’t want to go to jail or get sued for killing your challenger
#x. Claims that ________ style has already been proven in an unverifiable venue
#x. Claim that challenge matches have “rules”, whereas there are no rules on the str33ts
#X “The Dump and Chase”
Named after a hockey play when you throw the puck behind the net, and your team chases to regain possession.
Person A: Makes stupid statements and insults, (I thought about putting a certain group here but I don’t want Honor1980 and his crew to come back).
Person B: Blah Blah Blah Gong Sau, what are your qualifications?
Person A: I go to ________ School
Person B: Yeah, we got that…are you a student there or an instructor?
Person A: (Irrelevant response)
Person B: Are you a student or an instructor?
Person A: (Irrelevant Response) + “Just show up to the gym, we have open sparring on _______.”
Person B: I don’t want open sparring, I just want you.
Person A: Well we have classes on ________, you can come try out an intro class.
(The conversation continues into infinity and Omega and myself are left wondering where the hell the puck went).
—ask Omega about this and he’ll know exactly what I’m talking about.
How about replying “I have no desire to fight you”
That always works
That’s covered in the first paragraph, unless someone’s edited it.
Oh, so it is…
I’'ve seen the excuse that their art is secret and they wouldn’t want anyone to steal it used before.
I’ve actually had someone tell me to my face that that’s exactly why you haven’t seen Shotokan in the UFC.
But… Shotokan is taught in every town in the world isn’t it? If it’s supposed to be secret, they’re not doing a very good job!
#x: Laugh off the challenger as too far beneath you,
and thus, unworthy of any kind of response.
Then, continue to disparage them as 'internet posers'
as you continue to espouse your silly claims & POV.
`~/
.
#x Tell them you are not a living entity and you are in fact really an AI programmed to troll the internet.
Bait and Switch;
Stall on getting a waiver signed,
tell them they have to pick it up at a location many miles away,
only to discover that the building is deserted.
Legal-Fu;
Tell them you have consulted a lawyer Re: the waiver,
he will need to review it before it can be signed,
When called on the delay, say the lawyer still has not cleared the waiver.
repeat liberally.