How long did it take you to get from the size were in that pick to the size you are in your recent pictures ? It’s a pretty big improvement.
About 12 months of steady chipping away- and thanks alot, by the way. I really appreciate that. It’s been alot of bloody hard work, and I’m just starting to reap the benefits.
More sex, for example…
You should include the bamboo flute. Used for stick fighting and music. Picture Ian Anderson from Jethro Tull standing on one foot while doing kali. Or a group activity, kinda like capoiera, everyone in a circle playing their instruments, waiting their chance to enter the circle and show their stuff. Or would that look like Chinese flute playing and break dancing?
Everyone’s forgetting the key fucking ingredient here.
Now. Think with me. WHAT is the KEY ingredient in EVERY McDojo’s claim to authenticity?
Think… thats right!
LINEAGE!
In order to be truly successful, you don’t need secret tournaments that you won with one touch knockouts. That’s dumb. Tell students that and they’ll want to do secret tournaments for themselves, and the last thing we want is students actually FIGHTING is it? Why? Because then when people like us ask you to PROVE it, you can’t use the excuse that “our shit is too deadly in the ring”. If you have students boasting about winning secret fighting tournaments, then obviously it wasn’t too deadly for THAT particular ring.
No. Secret tournaments worked for Frank Dux when he sold books, but it’s a bad idea.
What you REALLY need, is an old dying Chinese medicine man that lived on the second floor of the fourth house on the sidealley of the sixth street in Chinatown (you know, that place with the lanterns) that you tried to steal a purse from as a boy, but who nimbly tracked you down through the crowded streets, took the purse back, and then saw hidden potential in your young street-urchin eyes, and then decided to take you in and train you in the secret ways of his art, passed down from generation to generation to the oldest son in the family. Explain that HIS oldest son died fighting in Vietnam taking the heads of those dirty Vietcongs, and that he had nobody to pass on the lineage to, and that when he died he passed on the sole mastery of the art to you. Also deflect any questions as to why ninjas come from China and not Japan, by saying that it’s a hybrid art and the first ninjas were servants of the Dragon Emperor who conducted recon missions into Japan, who were then emulated by the damn copycat Japanese. Thus, YOUR ninja school is even better than ALL THE OTHER Japanese ninja schools, because it is t3h authentic Chinese Shaolin Ninja!
Gentlemen,I wont to personally thank all of you who contributed to this post and to the concept that shall form NINJA-TAI-JITSU.I would like to announce this summer we shall be holding our first annual “SUMMER INTENSIVE TRAINING CONFERENCE.” T his is one you dont want to miss. I cannot elaborate on atendees at this time ,as they are all in the Middle East on "operations."Headbands and wristbands and belts, will be awarded.Tentative cost will be $2500.00 for this 8 day course.There will be a $500.00 registration fee and all headband ,belt and wristband fees shall apply.This fee shall be waived for all posting here ,you shall be my core ,my nucleus ,of instructors
Ok Im getting better at being a swindling scumbag…
CHI!! Another important factor to include. They cannot feel your chi, they fail and must pay more to get their belt. Can’t generate chi on their own or use it? A special course for the selected few who can afford or should afford if they want to learn the secret of the “GOLDEN DRAGON KISS OF DEATH LEVEL 88”! They must spend 8 years and 8 months and $8888 annually to learn this one of a lifetime chance of being able to blow the legendary Kiss of Death.
By the time, they spend 8 years and 8 months and waste that huge load of cash, they will be embarrassed to tell anyone that it was a waste of time and money, and probably kicking their own ass for the rest of their life for being a moron.