Ok, a slightly weird thread. A couple of days ago I got asked to take part in a charity event at my university called “Man of Kent.” Basically each sports club sends one member to stand around on a stage shirtless and do some push-ups and posing and stuff. Not really my thing but whatever, it’s for charity, I had a free evening and I’d get to represent the boxing club. Only now do I found out that I also need to do some kind of talent performance. Music, dance whatever, like the talent portion of a beauty contest. The problem being of course that I have no talents that transfer over to a stage performance. So anyway, I’m looking for suggestions for something simple and easy to learn yet superficially impressive so I can only look like a moderate idiot rather than a slobbering retard.
juggle. Easy to pick up and then you can do some kind of self-deprecating English shtick even if you suck, or take it incredibly seriously and still suck at it and treat it as a monster ironic joke.
I was considering just doing some strongman stuff. I’ve got nothing special, but I thought pistols, muscle-ups and clean & jerks might impress a bunch of fat drunken students.
Get some fake old-time strong man dumbbells, a leopard skin leotard or Edwardian bathing suit, and recite “the boy stood on the burning deck” while simultaneously lifting the weights and downing pints.
[quote=BaronVonDingDong;2061220]Get some fake old-time strong man dumbbells, a leopard skin leotard or Edwardian bathing suit, and recite “the boy stood on the burning deck” while simultaneously lifting the weights and downing pints.
Strongman fake stunts. You know, all the chi stuff. Rip a phone book in half, break a chopstick with your throat, have a line of 10 dudes push against you without moving you, having someone stand on your chest while your head and feet are on chairs with nothing supporting your back, having someone sledgehammer some concrete on your chest druing the above mentioned pose, etc.
[QUOTE=MrBadGuy;2061408]Strongman fake stunts. You know, all the chi stuff. Rip a phone book in half, break a chopstick with your throat, have a line of 10 dudes push against you without moving you, having someone stand on your chest while your head and feet are on chairs with nothing supporting your back, having someone sledgehammer some concrete on your chest druing the above mentioned pose, etc.[/QUOTE]
Dude, you’re a genius. I did a little Googling and came up with this site. Nothing too flashy but it’ll do the job.
Dude, do something funny & self-effacing… like the pistols & lifts etc you suggested, but maybe don an olde timey strongman handlebar moustache or equally cheesy gimmick so it doesn’t look like you’re taking yourself too seriously.
In a strange coincidence, I do an amazing impression of a cinder block.