Hobbitgoth Thinks His Sh*t Don't Stank

I have a bit of a dilemma here. There’s this fat dude at my school whom I abhor, and every day we give each other shit and basically blow off steam on each other (God, that sounds sexual). Anyway, today I snuck a penis butter and jelly sangwhich in this dude’s bag (still in the ziploc so no sticky mess :P). So he comes over and hits me with it. I go over and we do our usual dance then this other asshole comes over and says to me, “Do you want your jaw broke motherfucker?” I didn’t give him any ground and he kept threatening me about how he has such a huge collection of guns and how he wants to fuck my shit up (this guy looks like Steven Segal btw, ponytail and all). I still don’t move and keep giving shit to the fatass as per usual. Eventually the fatass pushes me over to where I was sitting previously and our daily fun is over, but something still feels wrong about it. Should I have done something to the other dude or just let him keep talking shit? I’m thinking of just apologizing to the fatass and have us just call it quits so I can focus on tormenting Steven Segal. Idk, any thoughts?

Edit: Sweet Jesus, some clarifications. I didn’t make the sandwich and the fatass and I mutually give each other shit, it’s this other dude that I don’t know if I should ignore or confront.

Cool story bro.

You should take him out to dinner to discuss things and work it out.

Steven Seagal became the first American instructor to open an Aikido Dojo in Japan

Puberty is rough!

It sounds like there is alot of sexual tension between the two of you, you should engage him in a deep discussion about his feelings.

Edit:: Does "today I snuck a penis butter and jelly sangwhich in this dude’s bag (still in the ziploc so no sticky mess :P). " mean what I think it means?

I can feel the sexual tension from here. Take PizDoffs advice, make it a quiet out of the way restaurant with suitable ambience. If you can, get in touch with the owner of the establishment and ask if they have a private booth, or table, that could be set up extra special- like, candles, rose petals, the works. It might cost a bit extra, but you are trying to work your magic here.

Remember this is the first day of the rest of your lives together.

Your responses.:new_321: This is why I love this forum. XD

Edit: And no, I just call peanut butter, penis butter because I am a very inappropriate person.

Do you do wing chung? If you do wing chung, you can destroy them both. With your awesomeness. In wing chung.

I’ll bet he enjoyed eating that penis butter and jelly sandwich almost as much as you enjoyed making it though I think the dog liked cleaning it off a little less then you did

[QUOTE=Snake Plissken;2469700]I’ll bet he enjoyed eating that penis butter and jelly sandwich almost as much as you enjoyed making it though I think the dog liked cleaning it off a little less then you did[/QUOTE]

Wasn’t my sandwich. One of my friends had it in his back…for a week.

[QUOTE=Hobbitgoth;2469684]he kept threatening me about how he has such a huge collection of guns and how he wants to fuck my shit up[/QUOTE]

Report him to the police, since Columbine they take this kind of shit very seriously and you probably won’t see him for a few days if not ever :smiley:

[QUOTE=Hobbitgoth;2469684]I have a bit of a dilemma here. There’s this fat dude at my school whom I abhor, and every day we give each other shit and basically blow off steam on each other (God, that sounds sexual). Anyway, today I snuck a penis butter and jelly sangwhich in this dude’s bag (still in the ziploc so no sticky mess :P). So he comes over and hits me with it. I go over and we do our usual dance then this other asshole comes over and says to me, “Do you want your jaw broke motherfucker?” I didn’t give him any ground and he kept threatening me about how he has such a huge collection of guns and how he wants to fuck my shit up (this guy looks like Steven Segal btw, ponytail and all). I still don’t move and keep giving shit to the fatass as per usual. Eventually the fatass pushes me over to where I was sitting previously and our daily fun is over, but something still feels wrong about it. Should I have done something to the other dude or just let him keep talking shit? I’m thinking of just apologizing to the fatass and have us just call it quits so I can focus on tormenting Steven Segal. Idk, any thoughts?[/QUOTE]

Kill his family, kill them to death.

[QUOTE=Hobbitgoth;2469696]
Edit: And no, I just call peanut butter, penis butter because I am a very inappropriate person.[/QUOTE]
So your 12?

maybe just change hands when your thinking of him during your morning shower.

that may work.

[QUOTE=Snake Plissken;2469700]I’ll bet he enjoyed eating that penis butter and jelly sandwich almost as much as you enjoyed making it though I think the dog liked cleaning it off a little less then you did[/QUOTE]

Joel Monaghan, is that you?

NSFW
http://www.buzzfeed.com/achoo/joel-monaghan-likes-it-doggy-style-uncensored-pho

The dog clearly doesn’t like it.

[QUOTE=donoraen;2469707]So your 12?[/QUOTE]

No, I’m 18. :frowning: Now I just feel ashamed.

[QUOTE=Hobbitgoth;2469684]Anyway, today I snuck a penis butter and jelly sangwhich in this dude’s bag[/QUOTE]

No wonder he got angry.

P.S. You’re a huge faggot. Harden the fuck up.

[QUOTE=Odacon;2469706]Kill his family, kill them to death.[/QUOTE]
Do you really want to create another Batman???

[QUOTE=helmutlvx;2469713]No wonder he got angry.

P.S. You’re a huge faggot. Harden the fuck up.[/QUOTE]

Ok there Mr. Internet Toughguy :stuck_out_tongue: